My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
