It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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