I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize