i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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