Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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