Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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