He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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