after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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