so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
