Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
