So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
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