everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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