One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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