i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
