glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
