it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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