Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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