my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Quick, to the slutcave!
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
My vagina just recognized that song.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
