This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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