I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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