Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
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