after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
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