what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
