Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize