Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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