u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
The adults are the big ones right?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
