If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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