things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
i think i just lost a toe
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
