She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
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