If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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