I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
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He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize