Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
