Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
they call him Oral-B. enough said
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
