i always forget guys have bellybuttons
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
