I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Randomize
