She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
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