I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize
