You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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