Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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