You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
my shit smells like andre
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize