when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
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She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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