I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
