i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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