You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
