So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Randomize
