bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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