So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
