If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize