Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Randomize