butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
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