there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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